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How to Save Your Marriage and Avoid Divorce

Few things can top the emotional effects that a divorce has on a couple, especially when
children are involved. There once was a time when you thought that there was no one
greater then the person you were about to marry.

You made a commitment to each other
to stay together for the rest of your life. It is a fact of life that couples go through hard
times in their marriage. But before you make a decision to get a divorce, you owe it to
each other to try to save your marriage first.

Many couples who end up getting a divorce have tendencies to look into their past. They
have dwelt upon the mistakes their partner has previously made, which has led them to a
place of resentment and an unwillingness to forgive.

In order to avoid a divorce a couple must focus on the present and embrace a commitment to move forward. Truly forgiving
someone means forgetting about what it is that they have done to hurt you. Forgiving
someone does not mean that you do not ìwinî or that your feelings did not matter or that
you are the weaker person by letting this go. Forgiving someone means that you are
stronger for being able to stand the hurt that they have caused you and that you can allow
the natural love that resides in everyoneís heart to guide your decisions. Rather then
putting all the blame on your spouse, focus on making things right.

In order to avoid divorce and save your marriage you should also be realistic about your
expectations about your relationship. When two people first get married, each one comes
into the marriage expecting it to be a certain way. Many times these expectations are
quite different and can cause conflict later on in the relationship.

Ladies, if you are
engaged to someone who loves to watch football on a Sunday afternoon but you think
that your Sunday afternoon should be filled with shopping, do not expect that once you
get married your spouse will suddenly put their foam fingers aside to spend an entire
Sunday shopping with you.

While it would be a nice gesture for them to voluntarily go
shopping with you instead of watching the big game, do not expect that on a weekly
basis. As much as we would like to, we canít change our spouses.

If they were a neat
freak before you got married, they are going to be a neat freak throughout your lives
together. Learn how to keep realistic expectations of how you would like the marriage to
be in order to prevent yourselves from disappointing each other.

Married couples who are able to learn forgiveness and let go of unrealistic expectations
can help improve their relationship. It is never too late to patch things up and restore the
relationship that you both have devoted your lives to. Before final decisions are made to
go through with a divorce, make a commitment to try to save your marriage — and make
it a happy one.